


loves

by buu



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-03-04 22:50:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3095354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buu/pseuds/buu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kageyama is strange, and sometimes Hinata's not sure what kind of love he falls under, so he just classifies it as Kageyama love. He's infuriating, he's rude, but he's also warm and soft sometimes, when he's slumped against Hinata's shoulder on the bus, when he's the person on the team who ruffles Hinata's hair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	loves

**Author's Note:**

> first silly drabble of the new year (/❛o❛\\) many kagehinas in the new year

For Hinata, there are many different kinds of love. There's the love for his parents, who bring him soup when he's home sick, who get him the best birthday presents (a new volleyball he's been asking for, even though they roll there eyes when they tell him he already has three). His parents have always been there, and he doesn't even remember a time when he didn't love them, except maybe when they grounded him for breaking a window. That one's on him, though.

There's the love for Natsu, small Natsu with her grabbing hands that sometimes get on his nerves when he's trying to do homework and she wants to see, see, see everything. Natsu is both hard and easy to love, because she isn't always the easiest to deal with, but she always comes back sweet and sincere and looking up at Hinata with wide, bright eyes. Hinata didn't even have to warm up to her when he first saw her, tiny face and tiny hands and bright orange fuzz.

There's friendship love, the one he has for his teammates, fresh and new and wonderful because he's never had a team before, never had people to support him and cheer him on and ruffle his hair when they win and he's so, so excited.

And then there's Kageyama.

Kageyama is strange, and sometimes Hinata's not sure what kind of love he falls under, so he just classifies it as Kageyama love. He's infuriating, he's rude, but he's also warm and soft sometimes, when he's slumped against Hinata's shoulder on the bus, when he's the person on the team who ruffles Hinata's hair. Kageyama's part of the team, but he's also different, because nobody else's compliments make fireworks spark in Hinata's chest and nobody else puts an arm around his shoulder when he's feeling bad. Nobody else shares their meat buns and doesn't fuss (much) when Hinata decides to use his lap as a pillow.

This kind of love is new for Hinata, weird and sometimes uncomfortable, but it's exciting and exhilarating and every time Kageyama does something new, he has something else to add to it, the way Kageyama looks when Hinata hits his toss, the way his face goes soft when he's sleeping, the way his face turns red and he stutters when he tries to say something nice.

Xxx

At first, Hinata doesn't recognize it as love. Kageyama is unbearable, tall and scary and impossible. He doesn't even feel bad about the fact that Kageyama's been benched by his team, because he deserves it. He tells himself he won't ever get along with Kageyama, ever, ever, and his mother asks who the heck this Kageyama is he keeps talking about at the dinner table. When Hinata realizes he's been talking about him all night, he flushes.

The one thing Hinata likes about Kageyama is his tosses. The first time he hits the toss, opens his eyes and sees the ball slamming to the other side of the court, the startled look in Kageyama's eyes; that's the first time Hinata feels his heart speed up and warmth seep through his skin. He doesn't know if it's normal or not, because this is his first real team, and certainly his first time hitting the ball like that. Kageyama must be feeling it, too, the way his eyes linger on Hinata and Hinata can't stop looking back at him.

Hinata hadn't been planning on talking to Kageyama any more than he had to, but with that toss starts some kind of weird partnership. Hinata thinks that's what he'd call it, because they're certainly not friends with the way Kageyama tells him he sucks. Maybe he's not the best, but he's never had anyone to practice with before, really, and that doesn't mean Kageyama has to be so blunt about it. But then Kageyama practices with him, keeps tossing even when Hinata's sure he'll say no to his plea of “one more”. He learns that Kageyama works hard, plays hard, and Hinata has fun keeping up with him, even if it's difficult.

No matter how many times he hits Kageyama's toss, Hinata never stops feeling the spark of heat that bleeds through his skin, starting at the sting of his palm and reaching down to his toes. He has a sneaking suspicion it's the same for Kageyama.

Xxx

Kageyama is the last person Hinata would expect to give him a pep talk. He's horrible at it, loud and harsh, but when he yells that he'll make Hinata invincible (in front of the whole team), Hinata can't help but believe it, and the feeling it sends through his body, starting with the thud thud thud of his heart. Kageyama delivers, tossing straight to him, and Hinata puts all the trust in his body towards hitting it. 

He supposes that it's not surprising he and Kageyama grow close with a trust like that between them, because soon enough they're not only getting together for practice. Soon enough, Hinata's genuinely enjoying Kageyama's company, as much as they still argue. Kageyama, despite his many, many shortcomings, is kind of fun.

Whatever Hinata starts, he indulges. If it's a race, Kageyama runs until he's wheezing. If it's an eating contest, they both end up choking down glasses of water when they can't breathe anymore. If it's rock paper scissors, they both end up yelled at by Daichi for taking too long cleaning up.

Every time they do something new together, Hinata feels his chest grow warm in a way it doesn't with anyone else. It wouldn't be the same without Kageyama, he thinks. Studying with other classmates isn't as fun, sharing lunch isn't as enjoyable, practicing with another teammate doesn't feel as natural. He starts to gravitate towards Kageyama, and soon enough they're visiting each other's houses and Hinata gets to see sides of Kageyama nobody else does.

He gets to see Kageyama's room (clean, much cleaner than Hinata's), the way he looks after he gets out of the shower with the towel draped around his neck, the way he offers Hinata a drink after they get home from school. Hinata can't stop grinning a lot of the time, and when Kageyama asks why he smiles so much, he shrugs and keeps at it, because he really doesn't know.

“Does it bug you?” he asks, one day when they're trying to do their homework together. Kageyama's quiet for so long that Hinata starts to feel kind of worried.

“No, you'd look weird not smiling,” he says finally, keeping his head dipped down towards his textbook, and Hinata's startled at the way it makes his face grow warm. He keeps smiling.

Xxx

He starts to realize it when he's thinking about Kageyama all the time, doodling his name in the margins of his notebook while he looks out the window and thinks about playing with him. Hinata knows the thrum in his chest when Kageyama touches him is different from the way he feels about his friends and his parents and his little sister, but he's not sure how. Kageyama's so much different than all of them, not better, not worse, just...Kageyama.

“You make my heart go like GWAHH!” he says when they're walking home, raising his voice on the last part, and Kageyama side-eyes him. “You know? Maybe you wouldn't know, since you're the definition of heartless.” And he laughs at the way Kageyama smacks his head, tugs at his hair, but it also makes his skin feel itchy because lately, that's not enough. He wants Kageyama to be closer, wants to rub their legs together and smell the detergent Kageyama's mother uses.

He also notices when Kageyama's hand lingers a little bit longer than usual in his hair, because he feels the distinct tinge of disappointment when he removes it.

Hinata doesn't know how to express “I want you to touch me” without sounding weird; it even sounds strange in his head. He's used to being affectionate with friends, and Kageyama's not really any different no matter how he grumbles and yells, but it's different. He wants Kageyama to touch him, just him, to pet his hair and run his hand down his cheek and the pulse point on his neck. He wants to clutch Kageyama's fingers and—

The first wet dream he has confirms it. This isn't a friend love, not the way Hinata spends the day flushing and remembering the imaginary feeling of Kageyama's mouth on his skin, the mouth he keeps staring at when they're together throughout the day. Kageyama yells at him for spacing out no less than five times, but he still can't get himself together because the way his skin burns when Kageyama's fingers clamp around his wrist just makes his heart “GWAHH” harder.

Xxx

“I like being next to you,” Hinata says, voice soft, when they're sitting together on a bus ride home. He thinks Kageyama might be sleeping, heads tipped together, but his eyes flutter open and he fixes them on Hinata's.

He doesn't know what he's trying to say, maybe that “I want you closer” and “you do weird things to my heart and my lungs and my chest in general”, but Hinata doesn't know how to say that, so he settles for giving Kageyama the softest smile he can manage. Even with the brightness toned down, he sees Kageyama's cheeks heating up and then there's a hand covering his eyes.

“Go to sleep, dumbass,” he says, because it's dark and they're both tired and everyone else is dozing. And the way Kageyama repositions them so that he's comfortable, warm and pressed together, makes it really very tempting.

Hinata waits, though, until Kageyama's breathing evens out, when his lashes cast shadows on his cheeks and the frown is gone from his face in ways that only sleep can manage. And then he slides his hand down, touches Kageyama's fingers gently with his own and feels the now-familiar warmth in his chest, because those hands are just for him, sometimes.

Maybe if he tells Kageyama he loves his hands, he'll get the rest of it. That's not right, though. Hinata doesn't love Kageyama's hands, because if they were just maybe disembodied hands without Kageyama, they'd just be gross and kind of creepy. He loves the things Kageyama does with them, the way he runs them through his hair when he's exasperated or nervous, the way he can impressively catch the ball with one hand.

He loves Kageyama's hair and his face and his shoulders and his knees, he loves Kageyama as a whole, and he thinks he's never felt anything like this before when he settles against his shoulder and keeps his fingers on top of Kageyama's.

When he wakes up, takes a peek at Kageyama, he's already awake and peering out the window.

“You sleep like a drooling log,” he says, and Hinata grins before he notices their hands are still pressed together.

Xxx

Hinata wants to kiss him. He's never wanted to kiss anyone before, but suddenly here's Kageyama, with his dumb face and his milk boxes and the soft hair at the nape of his neck. Sometimes they get close, their heads tipping together, or they end up nose-to-nose in the gym in the middle of an argument. Sometimes, Hinata thinks he could do it, right now, but then Kageyama's backing away and it's too late and he doesn't know how to.

The first time Hinata kisses Kageyama, finally, he thinks he's going to faint. He works himself up to it, watching the way Kageyama moves his head and his neck and bends his shoulders, trying to pick the right moment so he'll maybe, maybe be kissed back.

They're on the floor of Kageyama's room, struggling through English, and the lull in bickering over who is worse at it (Kageyama is) has left Hinata plenty of time to observe the way he bends over the paper in front of him, legs crossed and chewing at the tip of his pencil.

Now or never, Hinata tells himself, and the thrum in his heart is getting bigger and louder the more he crawls across the floor to where Kageyama's sitting. Kageyama doesn't even glance up, used to Hinata trying to distract him when he gets bored, and sometimes it's the other way around. He keeps staring at the sheets of paper until Hinata's fingers slip slide across them, crumpling them slightly and he glances up, annoyed. Kageyama hates it when his paper gets wrinkled.

“What the hell are you-” is all he manages to get out before Hinata lunges forward.

He doesn't even get their lips together before Kageyama's scrambling back, face red, and Hinata feels his heart thumping like it wants to jump out and kiss Kageyama, too. He looks cute. Hinata doesn't even care that his kiss misses, because Kageyama's backed up against his bed, and he can move in again.

And he does, and this time he sees Kageyama's eyes scrunch shut before their lips meet and it's like he's just stuck his finger in an outlet (he has before, once), but better.

It's hesitant, but Kageyama kisses back, and when he does, Hinata feels that warmth explode through his chest and doesn't think he can ever stop. Kageyama begs to differ five minutes later, when he's gasping for breath and pushing at Hinata's shoulders, but it's okay because Hinata kissed him and Kageyama kissed back.

Xxx

“I really love you,” Hinata says, when they're sitting on a bench with fresh meat buns. Kageyama's face gets red and Hinata watches, gleeful, because he loves when that happens.

“Shut up,” he snaps, mumbling around a mouthful of food. “You don't mean that.”

But Hinata does, he means it in so many ways he can't even keep track of them anymore. He doesn't know how to explain that Kageyama makes his heart soar, just as much as he makes him feel like he can fly on the court. He tries to explain it sometimes, but Kageyama ends up hiding his face in a pillow or his bag or, once, a volleyball, sputtering at Hinata to stop being stupid and embarrassing and shut up.

Kageyama's not good with words at all, so Hinata tries his best to show through actions, like the way he touches their shoulders together and slips his hand into Kageyama's free one. He watches closely at the way the colors spreads over Kageyama's cheeks, but when he doesn't pull his hand away, Hinata knows he's been accepted.

He squeezes Kageyama's hand. “I don't wanna eat meat buns with anyone but you,” he says, which is more Kageyama language, because this time he doesn't tell Hinata to shut up.

The easiest way to show Kageyama, though, is when they finish eating, and Kageyama's hand is still warm in his and the sun is setting orange in the sky. If there were a color to the feelings he gets from Kageyama, it would be this, and he hums in his throat while he watches the way the sky makes everything look warmer. Hinata tugs his hand away and Kageyama looks like he's going to protest, although he bites it back and stuffs his hand into his pocket. The way he looks sulky lets Hinata know that the feeling is mutual.

Hinata loves holding his hand, but at this moment he would much rather slide his hands up into Kageyama's silky soft hair, tug him down and press their lips together. He's still for a minute, because he likes to thing he can maybe transfer his gooey warm feelings through the kiss, and when Kageyama relaxes, nudges against him, he thinks it works.

Sometimes their kisses are short and sweet, and he likes that, but Hinata likes these longer kisses too when Kageyama's lips move lazily against his. It's taken a few times, but there's no more hesitance when Hinata presses up into him, opens and closes his mouth in time with Kageyama's, angles his head so they can kiss without almost passing out like they did that one time.

Kageyama's never explicitly said it, but Hinata thinks maybe he has the same warm feelings in his chest. He thinks maybe Kageyama feels excited and exhilarated too, when their noses bump as they pull back and Hinata smiles at him, open and happy and genuine, like all his Kageyama smiles (or most of them, when he deserves it).

This time, though, instead of embarrasses, amiable silence, Kageyama opens his mouth.

“I do, too,” he says, and his voice is rough and creaky and awkward. Hinata pauses for the time it takes his heart to start beating again, and when it does it feels like he's going to explode and he presses himself close, arms around Kageyama's neck and laughing into his shoulder. It feels like opening a pop bottle he's shaken up a little too much, everything spilling over and soaking all over Kageyama, who is sputtering “dumbass” because he's ticklish where Hinata is wheezing against his neck.

They walk home together, bumping each other's shoulders hard enough to send Hinata almost reeling into the bushes before Kageyama grabs his hand and yanks him back. Hinata laces their fingers together, invites Kageyama to come home with him, and he says yes and Hinata's chest burns with affection yet again.

There are a lot of kinds of love, and Hinata has plenty to spare, honestly. He just doesn't think he'd want to feel this sort with anyone but Kageyama, and later, when Kageyama's snuggled up under his blankets at Hinata's insistence (“why sleep on a futon when you could sleep with me in my super comfy bed?”), when Kageyama's arm drapes over his waist, Hinata thinks it's definitely pretty mutual.

"Hinata," he says, voice whispered soft against Hinata's hair.

Hinata responds with a sleepy hum, feels Kageyama's arm tighten around him.

"You...make my heart go GWAHH too, dumbass." And Hinata tells himself, when he wraps his legs around Kageyama and snuggles into his neck, that the fizzy bubbling feeling he's pressing as kisses against Kageyama's skin is definitely, definitely only Kageyama love.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so thankful to everyone who reads and everyone who comments! you all made the end of the year very good for me!! (˘ʃƪ˘)


End file.
